and The Ugly….

24 02 2013

Tonights post comes a little later than I intended as it’s been quite a long day. I’ve started working part-time at my friends takeaway in Kidlington to earn a little extra money before I go away but it does mean that I’m pulling 7 day weeks and some long hours to boot. But if you should happen to chance by the area, I thoroughly recommend swinging by to check out and sample some of the food. It is most definitely some of the finest Chinese food I’ve had in my life and I fear that all my hard work at the gym is about to go to pot :-P but the food is definitely the bomb-diggity. :)

No tonights post is about work but not this particular work however. A few weeks ago most of you who follow my blog will know that I started a new job but I didn’t say what it was. My official job title is Collections Advisor. I work in a call centre calling money from people who have borrowed it in the form of loans. Now a few weeks ago I mentioned that I could see myself there for the foreseeable future. While this is still the case I am not sure it’s a huge leap into the future as I’d first envisioned. Don’t get me wrong, I still like that job, the people I work with and the work that I’m doing, but what I don’t like is the people that my work puts me in contact with.

In the past few weeks I have been called every possible name under the sun, and while I’m not a prolific curser I thought I knew all the words but I actually even learnt some new ones. Plus the sheer rudeness of some of the people I call really has exposed me to an ugly side of human nature that I had no desire to find out about. Most people that know me I think would tell you that for all my thoughts and ideas, I’m a fairly sensitive soul and quite gentle, I have thick skin but I cannot abide by rudeness and while in life if someone acts out of line I would have no hesitation on calling them on it, I don’t have that same freedom in my job. It can be quite frustrating and this is making me have doubts as to whether I have the tenacity to last in this kind of job.

I have been told by one or two colleagues however that my skill lies in a different area of the company and they think I would excel better there, but I’d need to stick it out a bit in my role first before I could look at moving, so who knows, things might work out. Until then, I suppose I carry on suffering the abuse at the hands of strangers. Not really as enjoyable as it sounds.

These last 3 posts really cleared the cobwebs from my head and just got out some stuff that I needed to say. But phew! After all that I think we all need something a bit light hearted so heres a video of the cat cafe I’m going to visit on my first day in Japan with some lovely J-Pop playing in the background


Kal x


The Bad….

22 02 2013

I don’t particularly want to dwell on this post but given that I’ve been fairly candid in the past about my relationship with my family this really comes as no surprise. It really does seem that lately members of my family have moved from general dislike to outright animosity toward me, and this isn’t just paranoia, I hear the whispers quite literally. For all their bullshit, my brother remains the main antagonist in what I can only imagine is the grand plot to bring me down to speak. It never has been clear what exactly his problem is with me other than the fact he bears some kind of deep seated resentment towards me from some unknown crime I committed. And now I learn he is expecting his first child…

While the birth of a child in most situations is something to be celebrated in this case my heart breaks for the toxic state of mind it will suffer at the parenthood of my brother and the surrounding family the child will grow up in. As much as I would like to be a part of this kids life it’s not meant to be. Partly because the family will do their best to create distance lest I “corrupt” him/her with my wild ideas of free thought and following your dreams as I’ve noticed the same behaviour occurring with nieces and nephews who at one time couldn’t wait to see their uncle Kalam over other family members. And also partly because I know my brother will poison this kids mind with the same resentment of whatever crime I supposedly committed towards him. I’m almost glad that I won’t be around to see this kid grow up, and who knows, maybe this kid won’t take as long as I did to realise this family will hold it back in anything they don’t want it to do and break free from that mindset earlier.

While that attitude may seem cold, I’ve seen the same nieces and nephews that I saw so much potential in when they were younger, I see them now with their spirits defeated and absolutely no passion for anything that they do. All down to the same ridiculous doctrine being drilled into them from the earliest age that they should be “good muslims” and that the pursuit of happiness in the form of any kind of creative craft is an instant condemnation of their soul. Now consider to me and you that’s a complete crock, to a 10-year-old. It’s a life shattering revelation. That’s not to say that you can’t be a good muslim and be creative, but in this family they’d rather you were dead than bring shame upon them by not doing what they say whether thats a choice of university or what you wear when you leave the house.

A clean break and a fresh start is what’s needed. This year could potentially have big changes being enacted and it will provide both of those things, otherwise, it’s back to the drawing board. But we remain forever optimistic or at least try to, and try to carve out our own little piece of legacy. I for one when/if I have kids, will be doing my absolutely utmost to do the exact opposite of everything I see in this family, as I can think of no better way to screw a kid up…

Tomorrows post is The Ugly…


Kal x


The Good….

21 02 2013

So I’ve been purposely avoiding writing a new post for the last few weeks due to the fact I know they all would have been more or less about the same things, planning for Japan. But I think I’ve spoken about it enough and now I just need to get on with it, I will be attempting to update daily-ish while I’m out there so watch this space for my posts. I have been on lockdown the past few weeks saving to get the money together, as a result my social life has been non-existent. The upside, I’m holding down the foursquare mayorship at my gym like a boss! I certainly feel healthier and I don’t miss cigarettes anymore other than the occasional pang after a big meal or with a cup of coffee but that will pass with time I’m hoping.

Of the few social outings I have done in the past few few weeks however, one stands out. It was to see my good friend/brother Pat in his Musical Revue from one of his graduating shows from The Poor School where he’s been for the last 2 years. Actually it’s not far to say I went just to seem him, true he is the catalyst but I’ve made friends there through Pat so it was to support them all.

They started with a group number which was to be expected and enjoyable. Second up was the man himself and his girlfriend Gerda singing a song about taking a girl to the movies and picking the right one. A song that played wonderfully to Pat’s own sensibilities as a film buff and the most startling thing for me was the change in his singing voice from 4 years ago at solent. I was speechless, goes to show I guess what dedication and proper training can achieve. The next few numbers that followed were all highly enjoyable but you’ll forgive me for not mentioning names as I didn’t pick up a program. The first half ended with the number that I personally had been really looking forward to seeing from when they first told me they would be doing it. Rhythm of Life from Sweet Charity. You can see the video here and I challenge anyone to not fall in love with this song. What amazed me was the standout performance by Mr Ben Scheck as Big Daddy Brubeck and I’m sure I had the most stupid grin plastered on my face throughout the whole song as I sang along in my head. What makes the performance all the more incredible was that speaking to Ben after the show he informs he he’s had laryngitis for the past two weeks. I take my hat off to you sir. One of the things that struck me was that the performance space by no means large, was utilised really well through out each number.

The second half again had some throughly enjoyable numbers which again I can’t name for lack of program! The 3 that stuck out for me were the Jesus as a Vegas performer one, the one about going with the older man (had me in stitches) and the closing number. Arthur, you have a fantastic voice and I love your power ballad hand movements. Literally made my night. That and Pats Don Draper slicked hair :-P

I’m very much looking forward to seeing the class again in The Market Boy in the next few weeks. Genuinely excited about the talent in that class :-)

Well that was The Good, Tomorrow The Bad


Kal x